As a parent

Children can be worrisome and prone to injuries or illnesses. That comes with the territory as parents. You kiss their boo boo’s, apply a bandage, if required, and wipe their tears.

If the real problem is that their feelings have been hurt by some thoughtless comment made by another in anger, the same formula applies.

No matter what their age, it’s our job to solve any problems, soothe any hurts, and make it “all better.” Or that’s what we believe to be our responsibility, and we do our best.

My daughter is 60, an independent, strong woman, and also a mother. She recently had a total hip replacement, something I experienced when I was about her age. She is also my housemate and has assumed almost every aspect of my wellness and well being. I thought, before her surgery, that I would once again take over a bit of the housework, cooking, cleaning that she has assumed in our time together.

Not so. As I quickly approach my 85 birthday, I realize my ability to handle the things I used to do has somehow slipped away, and she still has control, the baton of care, has not been passed.

Fortunately, she is strong, a bit outspoken, (don’t know where she gets that) she’s not the least bit afraid of me and has retained her stature as a caregiver.

I know what I’m feeling is guilt……and realization. My head thinks I still have the abilities; my body thinks I’ve lost my mind.
Only a couple of weeks since surgery, she plans to return to her full-time job, managing an upscale restaurant in our little city known as a get-a-way location for tourists. She assures me her four-pronged cane is all she needs to function, and her doctor and physical therapist agree.

I don’t feel neglected; she can handle more than one ball in the air at the same time, she’s done that for years. I feel blessed to have such a capable woman in my life, and I call her daughter.

– Isobel from Hot Springs, Arkansas, a FAR customer who is finding purpose in this new stage of her life.

* The opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors. They do not necessarily reflect the opinions or views of the Finance of America Reverse (LLC).

This article is intended for general informational and educational purposes only, and should not be construed as financial or tax advice. For more information about whether a reverse mortgage may be right for you, you should consult an independent financial advisor. For tax advice, please consult a tax professional.