If there’s any silver lining to the past year, it’s that we’ve had some time to pontificate about the looming holiday season.
Graduating from the warm, summer months to the colder weather and winter months can be a shock for many, but it’s the spirit and meaning of the holiday season that keep many of us going.
And while many of us have been spending an inordinate amount of time getting reacquainted with our homes, we’ve had some moments to stop and think about what exactly this holiday season will be like— what it will feel like, smell like, and how we’ll be able to share it with those we truly love? It helps ease the coming feeling of change and uncertainty because given the wildly unpredictable year we’ve had here in 2020, not having a “normal” Thanksgiving is something most of us have had the time to at least think about.
So, in a year unlike any other, we’re left wondering just how much we can salvage for a holiday season that has been disrupted by a global pandemic.
It helps to start at the beginning.
For close to 400 years, the Thanksgiving holiday has been celebrated in some capacity in our country, persevering through the Revolutionary War, Civil War, two world wars, and, now, two pandemics.
Tracing the lineage of the holiday from the roots we’ve all come to learn in elementary school weaves a common theme that perseveres today: Gratitude.
The first Thanksgiving is steeped in folklore and mythology — hokey hats and giant-sized buckles that have spun tales that originated from a journal entry written more than two decades after the initial feast. The reality of the first few seasons spent in Plymouth is rooted in tragedy, resilience, and thankfulness. More than half of the Mayflower group was killed by a wave of disease and the initial gatherings were equal parts celebrations of survival and the mark of a successful harvest. According to historians, the settlers at Plymouth gave thanks to their God before and after their meals, as a way of showing gratitude for both their survival and the food that allowed them a chance to survive. For the Native Americans, giving thanks was an entrenched tradition of daily life. According to Linda Coombs, a former associate director of the Wampanoag program at Plimoth Plantation, “Every time anybody went hunting or fishing or picked a plant, they would offer a prayer or acknowledgment.”
No matter what you think of the holiday’s origins or its foundation in faith and religion, there is a handful of annual times to come together as families and friends to enjoy this time-honored tradition.
But in a year when we can’t exactly celebrate the way we’re used to celebrating, we can still enjoy the holiday.
That first season in New England for the colonists was entwined with sorrow and hardships that took a while to be rewarded by the eventual bounty and harvest, which, even rooted in its myth, have given us the holiday we celebrate today.
It’s interesting that this holiday almost went unnoticed for decades. The original document which referenced the holiday feast would have been relegated to the dustbin of history if it weren’t for Sarah Josepha Buell Hale. Hale, editor of Godey’s Lady’s Book, rediscovered the passage and used it as fodder for her magazine. Hale petitioned the president to create and formalize a holiday, and in 1863 in the midst of a great American Civil War, President Lincoln established the last Thursday of November “as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens.”
Change Brings New Traditions
As a nation, we’ve grappled with interferences in the holiday including the 1918 Spanish Influenza pandemic, the Great Depression, and many wars that have slightly impacted the way we celebrate. During the Depression, President Franklin D. Roosevelt even attempted to move up the holiday a week earlier in a bid to preserve retail spending ahead of the Christmas holiday. But, aside from the 1918 pandemic, many of these events have not caused us to physically stop gathering.
Great change often yields new and exciting traditions.
As the holiday of Thanksgiving has endured and persevered, so have we. In a way, this year really is no different.
One of the best things to think about is that we’re all still here. In a year of wildly unpredictable events and the pandemic, you’ve survived and made it this far. Looking back on all that has transpired, it’s easy to get lost in the fear and uncertainty of things. By being appreciative of the fact that we’re still here and acknowledging all that we’re fortunate to have is a great start to entering the holiday season on a wave of positivity and gratitude — the essence of the day that truly matters most.
There’s a number of things that we can do or think about that will help us propel forward in this, most uncertain and most unusual of Thanksgiving holidays.
Thanksgiving for one, two, or a few.
This year, many of us will be gathering in smaller numbers. Perhaps it’s just you and a loved one. Or, it could even just be yourself. In any event, according to Nielsen, food sales are telling the story of what this holiday will be like, and it’s smaller. People are scooping up smaller birds 44 percent more than last year, and seven out of 10 are saying their dinner will be six people or fewer.
Toss Convention Out The Window
While Thanksgiving is a tremendously popular holiday to gather and visit with those we love, it’s the lead-up that causes a huge amount of stress. From traveling to procuring food and supplies, it often seems that Thanksgiving is a ton of work compared to the short amount of time we sit down to eat. This year, we can toss normal out the window now that we’re freed of the obligations that seem to be the cause of so much strife and worry. Use the opportunity to get creative in the kitchen, source new ingredients, and dishes because chances are, you only have yourself and a few loved ones to impress. It’s also a time to liberate yourself from the immense work that needs to be done and to relax, take a breath, and focus on what it is you’re truly grateful for.
Breaking Routine
Oftentimes, it’s the routines that dictate our holiday gatherings. This year, especially for those of us who have lost a loved one, it’s maybe even more important to challenge the routines we’ve been locked in and find a new tradition. Creating a new tradition can be positive and affirming and take away the focus of the tendency to compare or contrast this holiday from the past. You can also honor older traditions this year for those who aren’t able to attend or who are no longer here.
Embrace Technology
We’ve never been more connected than we are today. If we cannot meet in person, we have the advantage of tapping our technology to help bring us closer. Prop up a mobile device or tablet on the counter while you’re prepping and cooking and see what loved ones are doing from far away. Create a space for far-flung family at your dinner table and use a video calling system so that you can light a candle, pray, toast, share stories, and cherish family.
Holiday in July
You’ve always wanted to celebrate the holidays during warm weather, right? Well, if this pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that we know we have the flexibility to quickly scrap our intentions and reschedule. If hosting a family gathering is an event of high importance for your calendar year, then try to plan it in the summer, say in July. You can choose a weekend that has fewer summer holiday implications and one where everyone can join from distant locales. Nobody is certain what the future holds, but in the warmer summer months of this next year, maybe life will be a bit more normal and then you can get two Thanksgiving dinners in the same year, a few months apart.
A Personal Reflection
Stepping into a more personal narrative, I think it’s key to remember how important being thankful is.
If you were to ask me what I’m thankful for, the answer will almost surely be the health and well-being of my family.
This past September, I celebrated a milestone birthday and reached a point in my life where the things that are truly most important are no longer status and climbing the corporate ladder in the hopes of success. I have an amazing wife and a beautiful daughter, and pretty much all the things I work for are so that I can spend time and make memories with them.
A couple of years back, our family emerged from a life-altering medical scare that, by most accounts, should’ve taken my wife’s life. Giving thanks and showing profound gratitude is a seemingly daily occurrence for me and our family. But, it took some pretty scary moments for us to get there.
This pandemic has shaken many of us from our daily norms and complacencies where we worry about our vitality, ponder our future, and instead, look at what we have with gratitude. When I’m about to exit this world, nobody is going to ask me about my career and how much stuff I have. But, I’ll most certainly want to relive the moments I shared with my family and the experiences we created for each other. I’ll want to experience those deeply moving memories and share them with anyone who will listen, again and again, and again.
And, isn’t that the true importance of this holiday where we gather to give thanks? This hasn’t been anything remotely close to a year we ever want to see or remember again. Even though many of us won’t be able to bring the family we love together, we can still find unique and creative ways to spend time with them. We can create new traditions, make new memories, and come together again and again and again — when it’s safe to do so.
Until then, it helps to know that we’re here, and we made it, and it’s time to flip the script and look forward to what we have instead.
This article is intended for general informational and educational purposes only, and should not be construed as financial or tax advice. For more information about whether a reverse mortgage may be right for you, you should consult an independent financial advisor. For tax advice, please consult a tax professional.
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